We talked about responsiveness in a different blog. However lets delve a little deeper at what it really means. The art of being responsible is showing up for life. When we learn things don’t go as planned, a sense of powerlessness may set in. Yet surrender calls for us to accept so we can do something. People will not fair well under our attempts to have things our way, as they are wanting the same. In many ways, we must reach the place where we can see people on our side and what would work for both. Communicate until a resolution is found if its possible and if not at least it was tried. When we become responsive to life, we are saying we can. We look for possibilities even if we don’t know what they may be. Instead of telling the future we carve our own path. Why let others choose for us how it might be. The disappointment in planning around how they thought it would be for you. I am firm believer that any future is possible and every future exists.
We simply must look for the opportunities and take inspired action. Letting uncertainty be safe becomes a sweet surrender where anything can happen. We allow ourselves to be cradled by life. Setting goals and resetting goals that fail. When we respond we are not forcing, we take on responsibility. Not a tough place of no mistakes but a place of re-adjustment, like adjusting our sails when we are off course in our life. Sometimes the rocks may get us as they hit the boat or perhaps we were charmed by the sound of the sirens who lure us into treacherous waters. In every controlling person is a child who has unmet needs. Reclaim the place where feelings are safe to have. When we choose not to be responsible we opt out of life. We say we want no part in it. However, the stage is ready but we do not arrive. Every time we opt not to be responsible we hand our life over to others. The reality is the fear of being powerful, and what it would mean for your life.
It means we cannot place blame where it does not lay. We must own what is ours and let people own what is there’s. This in turn opens the space for honesty and being genuine. It allows us to reflect on our lives and what we could or might change. Every time we manage the lives of others we take away another’s ability to have power in there lives and choice. We take away a person ability to be competent. Of course this is not saying that times arise where people need a helping hand from sickness, disability, extra pressures or its a a paid role. (some people hire people to cook and clean for them) Lucky them! However this is not because a person is not competent in that area. Life skills. In general a person must stand alone, yet be also able to be with others. Have the necessary skills to manage there own lives.
Look at an area of your life that seems to be out of your control. How can you be more responsive in that area? Do you want to reflect on your choices? The ones that are right for you! In life, we usually make the choices around us that others seem to be making, because we take the belief systems on of those around us accidentally.
Knowing this imagine an earlier scene in your life. How old were you and who was there? What was happening? What kind of choices were the people making around you! What choices did you make? If that younger self could have made another choice what would she/he have done. What would she/he have believed?
If you were to know how many negative belief systems she/made from that one choice how many were there! If you don’t know, then let the number come to you! Pick a colour of your choice and pop that number in a coloured bubble in your mind and let it float off. What would you choose now, what would you believe now in that area of your life. What responses do you want to take now!